Thomas Disch's LJ (RSS Feed)
11-30-2007, 07:27 PM
. --from the Danish of Soren Kierkegaard
They are believed to be a sovereign remedy
for many embarrassing afflictions: hives,
incontinence, anal warts, even the clap.
Ingest just one with a glass of your own warm
fluxion and you'll be your old self again.
Naturally, such medicine does not come cheap,
and the Royal Toileter is envied by all
the Upper Household, even the Master of the Hounds.
But if his emoluments are envied,
his duties are not. Every morning, on his knees
in the Royal Cabinet, hands extended
with the purple plumulum, a platen
consecrated solely to that day's emission,
of which he must not miss so much as
a pebble or a peppercorn.
Then it must be weighed, photographed,
catalogued and offered for sale on the King's
own web-site. How is one to price
such a commodity? To answer that, you've have to be
the Royal Toileter yourself.
More... (http://tomsdisch.livejournal.com/163197.html)
They are believed to be a sovereign remedy
for many embarrassing afflictions: hives,
incontinence, anal warts, even the clap.
Ingest just one with a glass of your own warm
fluxion and you'll be your old self again.
Naturally, such medicine does not come cheap,
and the Royal Toileter is envied by all
the Upper Household, even the Master of the Hounds.
But if his emoluments are envied,
his duties are not. Every morning, on his knees
in the Royal Cabinet, hands extended
with the purple plumulum, a platen
consecrated solely to that day's emission,
of which he must not miss so much as
a pebble or a peppercorn.
Then it must be weighed, photographed,
catalogued and offered for sale on the King's
own web-site. How is one to price
such a commodity? To answer that, you've have to be
the Royal Toileter yourself.
More... (http://tomsdisch.livejournal.com/163197.html)